Purr...

"She knows, now, absolutely, hearing the white noise that is London, that Damien's theory of jet lag is correct: That her mortal soul is leagues behind her, being reeled in on some ghostly umbilical down the vanished wake of the plane that brought her here, hundreds of thousands of feed above the Atlantic. Souls can't move that quickly, and are left behind, and must be awaited, upon arrival, like lost luggage. " - Pattern Recognition, William Gibson

I think my soul just arrived in Toronto some time between 4:00-7:00amEST last night. Nice.

It feels good to be home... in TDOT.

I just feel... here. Dave O has a theory that it takes 2 years to really feel at home in a new place... like to the point you're getting involved and know people outside of work well and that sort of thing. I'm not there yet but at my year and a half mark here in Toronto I'm starting to feel here. Right now Stas and I are just chilling in the living room just doing rando schtuff on laptop. No TV on (ROCK). Our last discussion item: How exciting it is that our freezer is kind of empty. Something so loverly and soothing about it. Its like country music. Strangely wholesome.

I was super bi-polar the last few days from being home, which tends to mess with my mind. I regress to... the silly younger sister who, compared w/Jen is unbelievable unconventional, flakey (because I studied social sciences and not hearty engineering, chemical no less), liberal (socially and politically). So it helps that to settle my mind I woke up this morning answered: where am I, as opposed to who am I, which is one of my favourite every-other-month-or-so-entries where I just write "ID" and start listing whatever comes to mind. Its nice to articulate the answer and remind yourself where you are and how excellant it is.

Where am I? I'm in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. I work in a sexy office that I decorated in just my style. Woot UM diploma on shelf. :) I love working in it. I am working for a pretty fly non-profit, memories and experiences from which have shaped me and my ID, not just in the org but with the other orgs/people I've stumbled upon through it: especiallllly SAL. I work with extraordinary people. Talk about driven and smart. Holy! I live with extraordinary people. GOOD TIMES - yoga, SYTYCD, Pizza in Yorkville, gyrate. I am far away from my old school peops but they are left right and centre living their dreams with mad integrity. My mum and dad and gram are relatively healthy. :) My brother-in-law is a goof. My sister is a happy momma. My nephew is pretty much the best thing ever born. Life is good. Think the point of my random rant is that I'm very very thankful right about now and feeling comfy in my shoes right about now. Bugger, that's always just about the time that things get REALLY shaken up. Yikes. Brace for impact. Happy Turkey Day. :)

Friday at the Sand Dunes - Yuma, CA

Dad was out all morning - turns out he was rounding up a pickup truck, trailer, and 2 Honda 4-Wheelers. Rock. It was my first time four-wheeling and I was having horrible flashbacks to my fathe4r's attempts at teaching me to drive a manual. Luckily it is easy and mad fun. Nevertheless, while riding I felt like I was being rock dumb and had some sort of death wish, just waiting for the damn thing to flip over while I was gunning it first gear full forsce up some sandy hill.

VANITY: I had not packed for four-wheeling in sand dunes. Thus my hodge podge outfit consisted of: of the shoulder AMerican Apparel bright pink shirt, fisherman's hat from high school (when not wearing massive helmet), pumas, and a pair of my mom's jeans - so old and ugly she doesn't even wear them anymore. SEXBOMB.

"Virgin Post"

Short, rushed, uncomfortable. Parfait. ;p
Indubidibly. Now back to work. Eep! Mehr spaeter...

CELEBRATION!

So fun. Just got back from an awesome event, courtesy of EDC and the wonderful, generous, warm, quirky Ruth Fothergill. Sitting with the chair of the Board of Ontario Trillium Foundation to my left and an extraordinary entrepreneur to my right, we listened to heartwarming stories of courageous women. Tara was there... we smiled at looked at each other during the event, partially warmed by the stories, partially warmed by knowing we were looking across the table at someone who would likely be up there receiving such an honourable award down the road. Gah. Just filled with so much happiness hearing such great stories and taking the time to celebrate local and national accomplishments. From my current job I really appreciate all of the qualities they honoured of entrepreneurship through their awards: courage, creativity, innovation, trailblazing... hearing them speak about how hard things had been and how rewarding being so CRAZY about an idea is. Living day and night for your ideas and your organization. Haha, the woman who won the export award said: "World Domination is a Full Time Job." Mmmhmmm. Ain't that the truth.

Number Two

Oh Stas... you're right, "2" abounds.
Damn you and your 2-curse.
Good game. 39:42 after a horrible 2nd quarter.
Buckeyes have 2 beautiful runs... really gorgeous.
Michigan second in the Big 10.
Tigers second in the World Series.
Proposal two passes...

Was awesome to catch the game in a bar down the street from the office with Stas though - chilling with other folks in their Michigan garb. Hell yes. Was feeling a bit homesick while trying to hunt down a place to watch the game. Nice to feel kind of "at home" "at Michigan" despite home now consisting of TDot and Cali.

Bit random but carrying on with today's theme of "2": Harsh and I just did Hot Power Flow Level II. HOLY. Its not just a little bit more advanced than normal Hot Power Flow... its WAY more advanced than Hot Power Flow. Woot for a good two today. Body was doing positions I cannot even describe. Its like when you get a massage for the first time at a spa and you are thinking: what is being done to my body??... except that you are in control and you are STILL not sure what is being done to your body. Whole body in blissful pain.

Don't hate the player, hate the game... unless the player is a woman.

Just had another riveting convo with Tai Tai. :) Its not as if I'm new to the idea of the double standards re: women, just thought I'd share another one we found! Good times!

If a man's best friend (male)and a woman he was seeing kissed, that man would most likely be mad at the woman.

If a woman's best friend (female) and a man she was seeing kissed, the woman would be pissed at the woman.

The odds are against us, really. Women cannot stand women. Men often can't stand women and many don't take women very seriously. So... basically we're fucked. Woot woot poo poo. The best thing is that people think that if women hate women, then its justified... just like black people calling one other niggers. How soon we forget that we are alllll socialized by the same institutions, most of which aren't run by the most diverse group of individuals... the US Senate provides a great example, one of many. Its not as if, for instance, women watch one set of news and men watch another. I guess its about forgetting, or taking for granted how much influence institutions like media, government, and education have on our preferences. Woot for what I think is Gavant's third type of power - making people think they WANT to do what they are doing.

Was nice to reflect with Tai about all the instances when we have indeed held women to different standards than men. Its fucking subtle. Show love.

Heart-broken

Mid-term elections. Out of the States, I'm feeling a bit removed. I was a complete imbecile and did not register for my absentee ballot in time... therefore I feel like the scum of the universe, being so fucking passionate about citizenship and not preparing myself for the vote. FACKKKK. ):

I’m still try to catch myself up to speed on the results of the elections. One of the first things I heard about them from a fellow Wolverine has absolutely broken my heart. Proposal 2 passed. Affirmative Action is banned in Michigan.

Horrifying. Its barely noted in the news but to me its this enormous leap backwards for social justice. A state like Michigan not understanding the need for affirmative action? Unbelievable. I really need to understand how people can think that they are supporting equal rights by banning it. No, it is by no means a perfect system, but if we wait around for PERFECT systems for every devastating problem in the world, NOTHING would change... that is undoubtably a reason for inaction. Just yesterday a colleague made a simple mistake but didn't tell me right away. Why? She had not yet come up with a solution for it. Gahhhh! That logic is what keeps people with the power and responsibility to create change from doing... anything! For the love, do not take away one of the only safeguards of the meritocracy that is the US without having some other method of ensuring those who have been oppressed have a fighting CHANCE to have a good education.

Overwhelming... between the tremendous shame I have as a citizen for having been so irresponsible as to not vote and the tremendous sadness I feel for Michigan, and in turn the US, and in turn, based on the current hegemony, the world...

On a slightly lighter note, feeling really gloomy after hearing this news the other day, my friend fernie managed to bring a smile to my face in the midst of my ranting. Haha. Excerpt from chat:

me: right equal rights my ass
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
FUCKING MERITOCRACY
FUCKING UNLEVEL PLAYING FIELD
FUCKING... SLAVERY
goddamn goddamn
Fernando: hahaha you should print that out and frame it.

And the winner is.... GUINEA!

It is about DAMN time Kim, the final unofficial member of the Michigan Pimp Pad got her asignment from the Peace Corps! She'll be working w/SMEs, helping transfer skills to people starting/owning small business. WEEE! So let's review:

SM - Canada
SJB - Argentina
AES - Argentina
CM - Ireland
RC - France, and the latest and greatest...
KW - Guinea!!

So proud of us womenz.
I'm clearly the boring one of the bunch, but I still love Canada. :)